ICLW Introduction

Hello and welcome to all of you folks here for ICLW! I haven't participated on this blog the last couple of months due to life being too overwhelming, but I am happy to be back in the reading and commenting marathon this month!

I will now provide you all with a Rea.ders Dig.est version of my journey through infertility.

In 2004 I met the love of my life. One year and 2.5 months later, we were married. We originally wanted to wait a year before embarking on baby making, but 6 months in, that plan was tossed out the door as I had a very irregular cycle in which I spotted and bled for two weeks. At the time I thought I had miscarried. In retrospect, it was an anovulatory cycle. A couple months later in November 2007, I stepped foot in the infertility clinic for the first time.

My initial diagnosis was that I wasn't ovulating on my own, so I was started out with the usual ch.lomid and timed intercourse for three months. Then we went onto injectibles with ch.lomid. We were forced to take a couple of cycles off here and there, usually due to overstimulation of my ovaries, but for the most part we gritted our teeth and kept going month after month. Before we knew it, we had been doing treatments for a year.

It was by chance on a Sunday that it was my doctor's day off, and I ended up going in for a follie scan with the doctor on call, who happened to be the doctor above mine and was teaching mine the infertility specialist ropes. Long story short, he was upset when he found out what she had been doing to me because she had ignored what he had told her to do, which was why my cycles were so messed up. After that day I was under his care, and that cycle turned into an IUI, which was unsuccessful.

After the IUI failed, I opted for a laparoscopy (something my previous doctor had NEVER mentioned). It revealed I had moderate and extensive endometriosis, PCOS, and a septated uterus. The endo was removed, my ovaries were drilled, and my septum removed.

A few months later my husband and I decided to move to his home state, Texas. I got a job that relocated us and we put our baby making on hold while we got situated. Two and a half months into my job I went to see a doctor here because my weird annovulatory cycle had returned (most likely due to stress) and my husband wanted to pick up treatments again. The first time I met my doctor, she made me take a pregnancy test... that came back positive.

Nine months later our beautiful little Baby Bean was born.

I always hoped that I would be one of those infertiles who fights the good fight, gets the baby, and then goes on to easily have more babies without having to fight the good fight again. I should have known better.

It was during my c-section that our next hurdle was discovered. Due to the removal of my uterine septum, Baby Bean's placenta had implanted into the scar tissue left behind. During my pregnancy, my contractions forced her placenta through the uterine muscle. On the day she was born, my doctor removed her placenta, which tore the uterine lining the rest of the way and resulted in a uterine rupture. We were told we would be able to try for more children, but that we had to wait at least a year to let the rupture heal, and then were informed our future pregnancies would be extremely high risk.

Last month I went to have my IUD removed so we could get back at TTC again. I'm not a young woman, and my clock is ticking. My husband and I always wanted 2-3 children, so we knew time was of the essence when it came to getting back into the game.

To be on the safe side, my doctor ordered a sono to check the scar tissue. The sono revealed the rupture had not healed the way we would have liked and made my chances of a rupture during pregnancy too high to risk. (To read more about that day, see this post.) Meaning it could split open and leak the baby into my abdominal cavity. The baby would most likely die, and I would have some serious issues of my own.

We are currently seeking surgery, which will greatly decrease the chances of a rupture, but we have been told we are still at a 40% risk. We have an appointment with an RE on Tuesday to discuss our surgical options and pregnancy risks after the surgery. We are also seeking a second opinion from an RE at the May.o Clinic in April. We are just hoping for better answers and options, but we know what we are up against is very risky. The bottom line for me is that I want another child badly enough that I am willing to fight this fight. I just have to pray I win.

So there you have it, my struggles in a nut shell. Thanks for stopping by, and I hope to make it to your blog soon!