Wish Granted

I am not quite ready to do my product review on any of the fertility products I just bought. I am waiting until at least this cycle is over to give my final say. I never did like people who gave product reviews on something they just barely bought and have only used a couple of times. I give way more stock into the ones where the user has had the product for at least a few months, and even better if they have had it for a year or more. The reason I wrote that is because I am about to give you a little insight into the Ov.acue Fertil.ity Mon.itor (herein referred to as OFM), but I don't want what I write to be taken as a review by any stretch.

In my last post I expressed my desire to quit focusing so much on trying to get pregnant. I wanted to hand it all over to God and let things be in His time, not mine. I want to hand the reigns over and go back to living my life the way I had from the time my daughter was born until three months ago when we were finally able to try for another baby. I want to focus on living each moment and paying attention to the things that really matter and not my fertile signs.

After I wrote that post I came to the firm resolve that no matter what happened with the monitor, I would not use OPKs this month. That is a HUGE step for me. ENORMOUS. OPKs have become my comfort and solace, my safe place, and my indication that all is well with the world. In fact, I am sure the makers of OPKs cried when I bought my monitor, and I am sure they cried even more when I decided they weren't going to be a back up plan this month.

I started using the OFM on CD5 this month because that was the soonest I could get it in my hot little hands, which also happened to be the very last day of your cycle that you can start using it. They recommend CD2. The first few days it told me I wasn't fertile, we which all knew. Then on CD11, it told me I was possibly fertile. I was a bit surprised, but went with it. It then predicted that my peak fertile day would be on CD14. It bases this off an average of 5-7 days after you first enter your possible fertile phase. I waited for CD14 to come, and for the color of the day to change from "highest fertility" to "highly fertile." It didn't. So then I waited for CD15 (today) to change from "highly fertile" to "highest fertility." It didn't. But I know I am just as fertile today as I was yesterday based on my body cues.

My next step was to hop onto their website to see what a typical cycle looked like just to gauge my readings. It was then that I found out the first couple months are basically throw away months, just like the first few months of fertility treatments. The monitor is going to use my readings from this cycle and next to determine what is fertile for me. Right now it is going off of what happens for women on average. There is one way to be able to tell exactly if I ovulate this month, but that entails buying a va-jay-jay sensor for another $100, which I am just not willing to do right now. It's Christmas, and I don't need it that bad.

What does this mean to me? It means my wish was granted. This monitor isn't going to tell me anything this month or even next. Right now, it is getting to know me just as much as I am getting to know it.

So as of this afternoon, my fertility has officially been handed over to God. I've done my part to ensure everything is in working order, and I will do my part to make things happen, but I am done stressing about it. Our next baby is now in His time, not mine.

It is amazing how freeing writing that last sentence is.

Take it away God!